drawing reflection

Drawing has always been an insecurity for me. Having had very little formal artistic training and being someone who appreciates art , likes to paint, and has an interest in visual culture and design, (in the grand drama of my mind) my eligibility as a legitimate creative person has always been threatened with potentiality of someone asking me to draw something. My fear of drawing was fueled by the notion that if I was asked to draw realistically,  I would be exposed as an untrained, untalented fraud. So, in order to avoid such a painful course of events, I developed the defense mechanism of presumptively stating that "I can't draw" before I could be ashamed by my talentlessness. This defense mechanism was so deeply internalized that, before this class, I had pretty much escaped all potential shameful encounters and had barely drawn at all. The emphasis in this class on our technique and personal style as entities to be cultivated and improved helped derail my flawed perspective on drawing. The use of drafts and sketchbooks helped to assure the less-confident student that drawing production does not need to be monumental or awe-inspiring to be a helpful step in personal artistic development. Not only did this semester help me work through my insecurities but also I was able to appreciate and enjoy an activity that for so long I associated with anxiety and fear.