Drawing to me is a way of exploring abstract ideas that often form in my mind. It calms my nerves. The last two years of high school, with all the SAT preparation and college applications were my most stressful and not surprisingly also my most productive where drawing was concerned. I think I filled about six 50-sheet sketchbooks. Drawings allow me an avenue to privately and quietly vent out complex emotions at times and also to just take my mind of something stressful with out having to do too much. A drawing can take me anywhere from a few seconds to complete a simple doodle or several hours to create an elaborate sketch.
I like drawing using a ballpoint on a thick ivory sheet. I like the greasy mark that the ballpoint makes on the sheet and especially enjoy creating crosshatch patterns. The feeling of the pen digging into the paper is a very satisfying one. I love how, by simply varying pressure I am able to create marks of a myriad different thicknesses. When I am writing or speaking, I often feel that there is a disconnect between the original thought and what I am able to express. This could stem from the fact that the human mind works faster than I can possibly hope to express. I feel the medium some how alters the thought in these cases, however in the case of drawing I don’t feel this disconnect I feel like the image just flows out. The best part is that when I sit down to draw I don’t have a clear idea ass to what it is I am trying to say – I don’t have to. Drawing affords us that freedom. I don’t think I can say the same for expression through speech; the result would be nonsensical word vomit. There is a reason why phrases like “Think before you speak” exist. Drawing makes no such demands.
A sketchbook is also a great way to map one’s own thoughts and incidents in one’s life. Whenever I flip through any of my sketchbooks I find it amazing how I am able to recall the moment of creation of each of the drawings. Sometimes I can recall entire scenarios that led me to create a particular drawing I made months or even years ago. It is hard to explain but it’s one of the most exciting feelings I have experienced.